Do you have regrets from your past? We all do, right?
It could be as small as cutting off your hair, or as big as a fight that ended a friendship.
How many times have you woken up from a big night out and instantly felt ‘hang over regret’?
Emotions fall into one of two categories: Useful emotions, or indulgent, not useful emotions.Where would you put regret?
I’ve discovered that regret can be useful if we use it to make a positive change in our lives.
For example: A big night out ending in a way we wish we could not remember is useful regret if we learn from our mistakes and not do it again.
If you are using regret to blame ourselves for something that we didn’t do or for something that happened in the past, then no, regret is NOT useful.
When you are constantly focused on your past and arguing with it, that’s regret.
If you regret something in a moment, “hey, I could’ve have done that differently,” and we adjust now, that is useful regret.
You can choose, look back and regret or look forward and adjust and create a different outcome.
Which feels more useful for you?
How I choose to think is, “What is meant to happen will happen.”
This thought instantly dissolves regret, OK not instantly. Sometimes it takes a little practice but each time it gets easier and easier.
It does not help arguing with the past. When we argue with the past we are always going to lose.
Instead, what if you looked at an opportunity and decided, “I choose to do this now, so I don’t feel regret later.”
Now that’s a more productive use of regret.
Remember, we can’t change behaviour from our past but we can change how we behave in the future.